How Brett sees Malta

As part of the Excellent Adventure Series in the Kiwi Travel Blog, Brett from New Zealand writes about a visit to Malta:

Timing is everything. From watching wildlife in Kenya, we’ve arrived in Malta and apparently we’re around 180,000 years too late to see the Maltese hippopotamus. And if we had jumped in a time machine we could also have spotted pygmy elephants. Apparently they were the size of a German shepherd, and fellow refugees from Europe’s Ice Age when Malta was joined to Italy.

Fresh off an Emirates time machine from the electricity free villages of Kenya’s Masai people via Dubai’s 21st century over-achievement, our first experience of Malta is the prehistoric temple complexes at Tarxien and Ħaġar Qim. (That’s just a sample of Malta’s unique language which mixes Arabic and Italian and tosses in Brit colloquialisms like “Orwright?’)..

Day two in Malta dawns sunny, so we trundle off in our hire car to the fishing village of Marsaxlokk, (pronounced Marshes-Shlock). Malta’s recent British heritage has an inevitable Latin spin - we’re just 60km from Sicily after all - and the vibe is kind of Coronation St meets the Coliseum. There’s local football teams called Wanderers and Hotspurs; the island is patrolled by a team of old Bedford and Leyland buses; and red phone booths dot street corners. Trotting is a big sport on Malta, and on the way to the morning market at Marsaxlokk, horses and sulkies share the road with Sunday morning traffic including loads of 1970s British cars like Cortinas and Minis.

At Marsaxlokk, we soon realise we’re in the Mediterranean though. Stretched along the waterfront corniche crammed with colourful fishing boats, is a riot of fish vendors, fruit and veg sellers, and stalls selling the usual Euro-tat mix of cheap shoes and cheaper clothes. The sales pitches are all delivered in the Malti dialect, sounding like Arabic or Hebrew with an Italian accent, and peppered with English phrases that could came straight from Eastenders.

A huge Maltese Labour Party flag is flying above a café run by the local Labour Party, and we fall into conversation with locals John, Yvonne, and Charlie. Our initial idea was a quick coffee and a few imqaret, (tasty date pastries), but soon we’re sharing Maltese sausage, garlic snails and peppery goats’ cheese. I’m driving so I decline a local Cisk lager, but after a second espresso, the café suddenly fills up with local TV crews. Our new friend John, who’s already decided it’s not too early for a few beers, jumps up and introduces us to a well-dressed guy in a suit. Wiping imqaret crumbs from my fingers, I shake hands with Alfred Sant, Malta’s Leader of the Opposition and potentially the country’s next Prime Minister. I’m still not sure if I managed to stay out of the way of the TV cameras though.

More from Brett: More affordable Malta; Gozo is the new Tuscany