Chig's MaltaSong

The World of Chig gives a minute by minute account of the Malta Song for Europe semi-finals:

It's multimedia multi-tasking night here at Chig Mansions. We're watching Maltese TV on t'internet in the lounge (via the link here on ESC Today's page). Malta is having a qualifying round tonight in their quest to choose this year's song for Eurovision, 'Malta Song For Europe 2007'. This is purely to fill a quiet Thursday night's television in Malta before Saturday's final, which will feature only six of tonight's sixteen songs. And boy, do they know how to fill a night's television, as last year's final was about four hours long. We are also trying to cook dinner and will be watching The Bill with the other eye.

I believe Malta may be sitting on the winner of this year's Eurovision in Helsinki. Olivia Lewis's 'Vertigo' is absolutely bloomin' fantastic. and if it's not one of the six songs that Malta picks tonight for Saturday's final, I will weep. It blends Western pop, Middle Eastern sounds that will allow Wogan to declare it has 'the whiff of the souk' without even waiting for Turkey's entry, and flamenco handclaps which should draw in the Southern European votes. Yet, it doesn't sound like the contrived mess that all that would imply. It has a good intro, a fabulous long note and an impactful ending. I adore it, and a look at my last.fm stats reveals that it's the track I have played most on my PC since November! I won't upload it anywhere, as previous ventures in that direction have turned out to be a waste of time, but if you ask me nicely, I will happily e-mail you the MP3. The Schlagerboys are also tuning in for Malta. They've picked the six songs they think should go through to the final. Well, I say six...

20:15. We're five songs into the webcast and I feel like I've zoomed into the 1980s. Is this modern Malta? Padded jackets and soft rock abound so far. Yuk! Bring on Olivia! Bring on the dancey pop!

Now there's some mincey queen singing Blue Suede Shoes and sashaying into the audience! Is this the interval act? ..

20:34. Ooh, we're back on! The female presenter is reading out a list of sponsors. This is soooo Malta. We may have missed the obligatory shot of someone or other arriving by Air Malta.

20:39. The Maltese version of Busted are on now. They're called Klinsmann Coleiro. They have clearly been drinking too much Red Bull as their song is called 'She Gives Me Wings'. The webcast is buffering badly, which makes it sound really out of tune. PC Honey Harman's colleagues still haven't twigged that she's dead.

20:43. The next singer, Julie Pomorski, is in a nightdress, on a swing, with a 1980s perm. Honey's fingerprints have been found at the scene of the drugs bust. Still the plods haven't realised that Zain is bent. Nightie girl is quite badly out of tune, even with no buffering.

20:46. Proving that simplicity is often best, Daniela Delicata (great name) is singing a jaunty little song, while playing a big guitar, à la Nicole. Sun Hill have been briefed that Honey is a high priority misper.

20:50. Malta's version of Cher now, half Cher's age but wearing a cross between a poncho and a flamenco dress. Good voice actually, but the song's too MOR for Eurovision. She's called Pamela, and The Bill's on an ad break.

20:54. Maltese TV's on an ad break too. Buitoni pizzas and Peugeot 207. Ooh blimey! They're back in the studio and the presenters aren't ready. Long silence. Someone brings a lecturn onto the stage. Now the presenters are singing Ruslana's 'Wild Dances', very badly. Smithy has found what we already know will turn out to be Honey's blood on the bridge...