Aussie Guide to Maltese people

Charmaine is a Maltese airhostess who lives in Sydney , Australia and blogs on MSN. This is her 'Guide to Maltese people':

*You don't have to have a Maltese backgroung to impress a Maltese family - *You should know that Popeye, Cutthroat Island, Gladiator & Troy were filmed in Malta - Maltesers were not invented in Malta - Maltese terriers were actually first bred in Malta - The Maltese cross is a throwback from the days of the Knights of Malta - the Maltese Falcon never existed in Malta - If you don't eat fish, hate swimming,Bet on Horses, soccer & Elvis and don't like fishing, you will have to find another way to impress a Maltese Dad.... GOODLUCK!!!! - If you are not good with dinner table manners a Maltese mum will be highly unamused- and above all, do not fart or burp any where near her... (unless you are close family) - Maltese do belive in the evil eye - NO point in having a debate on the merits of turning Jehovahs Witness, or Muslim, 99.9% of Maltese are Catholics. (the .1% were killed by there fathers!) - You won't need a translator, most Maltese speak english well, and you will never forget a Maltese accent - If you run your own business, a Maltese father-in-law will be very impressed - If you are invited to a Maltese gathering, get familar with the likes of gassatat, pastizzi, figolli, cannoli and my fav FENECK - If you are Catholic, but you weren't Confirmed & didn't do your Communion- DONT mention it! - Most Maltese take exception if you say "I've heard Malta is like Italy or Greece" frankly it ain't - If you are over 22 & not married a Maltese grandmother will think you must have some sort of physial problem or disease - If you don't understand how to gamble on horses, play bingo, or play poker, you won't get on a Maltese father-in-law good side - If you don't know what kinnie is... FIND OUT! - If you hate to talk, you better be good at listening - Expect to put on kilo at every Maltese gathering you have attended in any one year - Most Maltese Grandmothers think jeans are for poor people, so don't go prancing around in your $200 vintage Levi's! Most of all don't say they were $200! - Know your Maltese celebs.. Edward De Bono (lateral thinking), S2S (music), Joe Camillri (music), Darren Gauci (jockey) Sean Micallef (comedian) Kevin Muscat (soccer), Amber Valetta (model) & Jeff Fenech (boxer)